Problem is, now normal coffee tastes like shit. Pun intended.

Why ban touching? Well apparently the principal is worried that someone will see someone giving someone else a high five and think “well if HE is giving a high five, why can’t I punch someone in the face?” No, really… the guy is that stupid. Here’s a quote:

“You get into shades of gray,” Kilmer Principal Deborah Hernandez said. “The kids say, ‘If he can high-five, then I can do this.’ “

Shades of gray? How does this idiot run a SCHOOL? I can’t wait for Ava to goto school… she might get expelled for sneezing (also known as distributing a possibly deadly virus into the air.)

There also was a chance that Lisa’s organs might spread her cancer, he said.

Oh yeah, they might get cancer too.

The deaths and injuries were caused by stray bullets, sharpened kite-strings, electrocution and people falling off rooftops yesterday at the conclusion of the two-day Basant festival, said Ruqia Bano, spokeswoman for emergency service in the city of Lahore.

Wait wait, sharpened kite-strings??

Kite flyers often use strings made of wire or coated with ground glass to try to cross and cut a rival’s string or damage the other kite, often after betting on the outcome.

Oh that makes sense. Here I thought Charlie Brown was starting to freak. “Stupid kite-eating tree!”

About a year and a half ago is when we first ran into them. It was a couple in their late forties, I’d say. Anyway we were in Target looking for a mother’s day card when they approached us. The woman pretended to look at cards, while the man talked to me. He started with “do I know you from somewhere?” and then said “Did you go to college around here?” Then he said that he probably knew me because his “friend was a professor there… you look like you could be one of his students.” He made sure to mention the name of one of the buildings, although it was a building that houses no business classes so I knew I had never been in it.

He latched onto Diane when he found out that at the time she was looking for a job in graphic design. “Hey, I work for a company looking for advertisers… I can get you a job! Let me get your number.”

Diane got a bad feeling and never met up with him.

A few months later we were in Lowe’s Foods in Cary and we ran into them AGAIN! This time he asked Diane if she was a student around here, and that she “looked like she could be one his professor friend’s students.” His wife was VERY interested in the bread aisle while he said this. I told him we were in a hurry, and I think he picked up on the fact that he’s seen me before anyway.

Today we were in Lowe’s AGAIN and Diane saw them stopping another young couple. I’m not sure what they’re up to, but it stinks. I want him to start talking to me again because I want to actually go through with meeting him (giving him a fake name of course) because I want to know what the hell he’s up to!

Good day. look tribes used to slaughter the physician if his patient battered male corpse and substituted mine. His tag impression gained from his clothes. The old and new mixed

Sounds like the premise to a good (or bad) book.

But what do I REALLY want? What does every man need? His castle? Sure. A loving wife? Yup! A JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank? Damn right!

- 6hp Tecumseh gasoline engine, top speed 40 mph.
- Includes head/tail and turn signal lights, trim and underbody lighting.
- 400 watt premium sound with PA system, plush interior, and external camera.

400 watt premium sound system? Can you pimp in a personal tank??

On a related note, why do all Japanese robots have to do that little wave thing?

Anyway here is the result:

WHEEEEEEEEEEE!